Advent is Here!

The Advent is here already! It has been a mild winter and it makes feeling more earlier to have the Season. Also, sadly, our advent cactus, two of them, did not even bloom this year. I told my mother in law to not to put those pots under direct sunshine. However, she did. Both of them do not have even one single flower bud.
It is my second year to have the Advent in Northern Virginia. I know a little bit more what to expect to be in this busy season of the year and what and how to plan in my work. Our church has focused on this Advent with a sermon series of "What do you really want for Christmas". I know what I want for this Christmas. How about you? I want Peace in Christ in my family. Don't imagine that we don't have any peace in our home. :) We do. However, some members of my family seem still having been struggling to find the peace in Christ. I also want the peace. I have a number of times of experience that peace in midst of difficult times and middle of  no where. Have you? The peace can't be described but it is like a gentle wind  with warm and softed voice that no one can give in this earth. The peace sets me free from all my worries, struggles, and even iniquities.It never overpowered us. It is just so gentle. Also, it guides me to where my heart to be looking; only to Jesus. I believe that the Peace has been on earth in Christ since the beginning. However, we are not in Christ all the time to let the peace be found.

I pray that we all get to be still and open our hearts to recognize what really matters in this Advent and let the Peace cover us completely. So we can proclaim truly "Glory to God in the Highest, and on earth Peace to men!"

The Table of Thanksgiving

I am not an american yet. I have a greencard but need to wait 3 more years to apply to be a citizen. I did not grow up in here so, I do not know details about the history of America. However, I know well enough how people from Europe came to America, and a tradition of the Thanksgiving. I watched one of Charlie Brown cartoons about Mayflower and the first Thanksgiving at one of my girls school when I was volunteering. It gave me many thoughts on the pilgrims, the thanksgiving and the faith and prayers toward this blessed land. After watching the movie, I decided to bake a turkey as my first time in my life at our home for this year thanksgiving to share details of the thoughts with my children who are americans. I think that I have a responsibility to teach them a true meaning on thanksgiving that has been mis-understood in many ways in this world now. Seeing devastated situations when the pilgrims arrived in the State with a long terrible journey on the sea made me think deeper about status of their hearts on the first thanksgiving with only a few survivals in this strange land with the strangers. I could imagine what the table would look like and how their faces shine near the table. I don't think that they had all those fancy stencils, dishes, or even napkins with turkey pictures in them. Their table must have been very simple, but full of gratitudes, faith, hope, and even brokeness from their loss of friends and families throught the journey. There must have been laughters, but also tears near the tables. It must have been not only a celebration but also healing time to them.

I pray that people who sit on the table of thanksgiving this year have the moments of celebration and healing time among each gatherings as a true fellowship, and remember the true meaning of the first thanksgiving is not about materials but unseen spiritual things.

The Beauty of God's world

While preparing the Fall Music Festival at my church, I have learned more and recognized more what the beauty of God's world has: diversities, colorful, and uniqueness.
God created everything differently, even twins are not same. None of God's creatures is same. While I was walking lately, I noticed that even one single leaves are made up of many different colors, especially for those beautiful fall leaves. The colors make difference to be more beautiful. However, we, people, have sometime problems to accept that differences. Not only accepting, but also acknowledge that the other people's differences are also beautiful.
If you think about harmony in music, the harmony can't be the harmony without any combinations of differents notes. When we combine those different notes, the beauty of sounds starts. If you hear unison melody all the time, you get bored right away and it does not give much depth feeling.
I have been learning how to accept the beauty of God's world. It is just marvelous. Even though my small head and heart could not understand most of time, I still could feel God's smile upon our lives that we try to live in harmony among diversities of people.

I pray that I continue grow deeply to accept and open my hearts to see people around me like He does.

As a learner

People who have hearts of desire to learn are beautiful whether they are old, or young. Whenever I have met those people, I get inspired. Those hearts are open hearts; open to be better, open to get rid of their old stuff, open to be renewed by learning. Those people have similar attitude and condition; always being active, alive, positive, and giving energy to people around them.
I met a man who was retired from a good company, but still wanted to learn many things; he started to learn how to watercolor paint. And also helping others in a charity group. His face was shinning and young. I was surprised to hear how old he was; the vibrant face was from his ongoing heart to accept new things.
On the other hand, people who do not want to learn or want to stay where they are right now are not beautiful: being inactive, passive, and amazingly they are proud of themselves in many ways.
I have thought about myself in these two kinds of lives. One thing I know of is I want to be a person who has desire to learn always. That means that I am willing to give up on my old stuff when I learn new things.
I want to live as a learner wherever I am.

Alpha and Omega

There have been a number of tornados more than usual in the States during this Spring; They caused endless devastated stories, missing people, dead people, and destroyed lives. While reading those news, I have searching for reasons; really reasonable reasons. Well, I could find some articles from neurologists saying about cold air and warm air and so on, but it did not give me acceptable reasons to believe. I wanted to have reasons that lead to us to some kinds of clearly of why and what for beyond surface. Some people said that bad things happen without reasons. However, as I have read and read, I could not deny that God is the one all beyond those things. Just we don't know why. We might not know and understand until the end because we are not God. Sometimes, we make God as we want Him to be. We know that He is love. His love endures forever. However, I would like to ask what that phrase means. We might not understand His deep love toward us. I still could not understand why He let Jesus came to the earth in a manger that no one noticed, and why He let Jesus to be suffered so badly. Can you understand? I can't. He loves us that much and I honestly could not understand why He loves us that much. We are sinners who always are ready to betray Him. But still... He loves us. That must be a mystery and could not be solved as human being.
Even though we face many tragedies and un-acceptable cases, He is Alpha and Omega that we can't understand.

Welcome May!

I know.... I haven't been writing since February! We already passed Lent, and Easter and now, we are in May!
May is one of my favorite months of a year: in fact, May is called a Queen of the Months. May brings memory of deep fragrance of roses that I used to have in the yard at my parents' house. My grandma planted five different roses for each family members in my household. Mine was a black rose with deep redish strong one. One of my chores at home was watering plants in the afternoon. We had more than 100 pots of plants with flowers, orchards, and unknown plants. Grandma taught me how to water them with kind words like " you are a beautiful flower! grow well!"while I was watering them. Somehow, I was really good at it and enjoyed a lot. In month of May, those roses started blooming crazy. As you all know, the roses are not easy plants to grow: they need lots of care especially dealing with a little bugs. However, they smell gorgeous as they look. I also enjoyed pull a big thorn and put on top of my nose being a rhino. :) What a good memory!
May is also called a family month in Korea: there are children's day on 5th, parents' day on 8th, and teacher's day on 15th. We made carnation cosages to put on our parents' chest on the parents' day. Even though mine was not that pretty, my dad always wore them at his school! oh, how much I miss him.

Lately, the world has been up and down with big news; the royal wedding, tornados, and finally death of Bin Laden. What a variety news!
One thing for sure is none of them seems real. The royal wedding gives feeling of fairy tale, the tornados were too terrible to accept that they really came through within a few minutes, and the death of Bin Laden seems not real for sure thinking back 9.11 with deep wounded pain.
I have thought about a popular phrase with all these news:" What would Jesus do?"
I pray that in May, I think more with that question in most situations, and find answers to follow and live according to the words of God.

National Anthem

Well.. I could not watch the Superbowl last night because I do not have a cable and no one invited us to come to watch either. :) However, I heard about big moments and stuff afterwards. One of things was the national anthem was sung with wrong lyric. I thought that I misunderstood and went to website to find out what is going on. Interestingly it was true, so I watched through youtube. What a shame! I am not an American but I love the national anthem. It is already beautifully written and inspiring without decorated notes or messing up the lyrics. Most of all, it is shame the singer was chosen to sing the anthem. Also, it is very interesting that only American national anthem has been sung in various versions. I never heard any other countries anthems were sung with any decorated versions. Especially, the song should be sung with great respect as I could tell. I know, I might be an old school person still but why I felt so shame to watch that happened last night. And it made me kind of upset to think about people's thought about "music" and "art". I know.. I might be go too far to take. However, I think that it should be sung at least with respect again for sure. Music can be represented the level of common people's thoughts at that era. It was shame to see and hear what happened last night. There should be no excuse about forgetting lyric of national anthem in front of that crowd. I wish that people who choose those singers or artists think deeply with respect next time. I wish... people respect music and even a simple song.

Vacation

Have you gone to vacation lately? I haven't.

I think that one of reasons that I have been having my body symptoms is from lack of rest. When I was in college, I used to go at least twice a year to the ocean area. My loving dad bought a time share for me to use it. He knew how much I loved ocean and taking a trip there for several days. I do remember that I sometimes went by myself, just sitting at the beach, hearing waves and watching people. The trip usually gave me pretty good refreshment and energy somehow.

I love nature: ocean, trees, mountains, water falls, beautiful valleys, sky, and so on. I have thought about when I had a vacation or restful trip in any nature. Well... when we lived near ocean, we often visited beaches to have some fun time with my girls. However, I hardly remember when we went to somewhere else then. We went to Disney World several times but it was not exactly a vacation: it was more labor!

I wish that we can go to some quite place surrounded by good nature like Banff Lake Louise. I don't know why I love the place. I never been there but only have seen pictures. It looks really refreshing and cool. Somehow, it gives "heavenly" feeling too with harmony of water and mountains. So, I downloaded a beautiful wall photo of Lake Louise in my computer at work, imagining that I am right at the scene at least.

I was wondering how Jesus took his vacation in his time. I don't think that he took any vacation. He did not have time for that. He just kept healing, teaching, and helping the needy. I was wondering if he lives in the world now how he does things.

I noticed myself that I feel guilty sometimes enjoying restful time or thinking about some restful time myself. I think it is very important that I need to take one seriously to move on to jump further. I should enjoy and use the time fully and freely without guilty feeling. I pray that God gives me a chance to visit Banff and Lake Louise with my family, just sitting near the lake doing nothing but enjoying the view and hearing the nature. I could smell the lake and mountain truly.

Power of words

God has given us a special tool for only human. It could be nicely used to save people, or the other way. Even though most people do use them in daily life, none of people know how to use it properly in God's way.
Yes, it is "words". Animals can communicate with their signals and sounds but human has language to communicate each other. However, I think that this tool can be the most dangerous to use without any conscious. That is why it is so dangerous.
Lately, I have had chances to observe several people nearby how they speak, and chose words to express their thoughts and feelings. Interestingly enough, the words have been causes of hurting or loving chain reactions.
Even though we know so well that we need to be careful what we say, it is very hard to control our mouth without our effort and disciplines.
If we see how Jesus used His words to people, we could see how powerful it was. When Jesus cursed the fig tree, it dried up right away. It happened exactly to me once when I was little. One of my teachers told me to test with two pots of flowers. I gave same amount of water everyday but said totally opposite words to each pot; I said "I love you so much" to one pot, and " you are ugly" to the other. You could see what happened at the end. Believe or not, the one who heard "you are ugly" died without any reasons within a couple of weeks. I was shocked and found out how much power my words has!
Even though I saw what happened in front of me, I still sometimes use harsh words to people or myself.
James described so clearly how hard and important it is to use our words in James 3:5-6.
Why it is so hard for us to steer the tongue in God's way?

Job

The book of Job is not my favorites among the Holy Bible to read often. I was trying to find some reasons why I don't like the Book while I was reading it for my Disciple I class. I have found some interesting reasons why I don't like that much. First of all, in my deep mind, I do not like to see and get through any suffering and painful moments whether it is mine, or others. Secondly, I do not like to have arguments what so ever. I do not like to have any conflicts especially among friends. Also, I don't like to get judged like that. Third, I do not want to think about loss of children. Even though God blessed Job doubled portion and gave him prosperity, did Job forget about those sons and daughters who got killed before? At last, most interestingly, I want to justify everything clear in my knowledge in any situations or any people. However, as you know the book of Job, it is confusing and hard to understand in a number of things. In fact, the book of Job teaches us to see that we will not understand God whether we are like Job or his friends. Sometimes it is the biggiest issue for me that I try to understand everything I have faced in my certain ways. Even though I knew that I can't ever understand God's world well enough, I still try to justify them. I should just admit that I am a human who can't understand even near to what God has in mind.
There are uncountable things that we don't understand in this world. What I need to do is pray for God's mercy and grace upon us. That is only way that I nearly can be near to God. Humility is the key to go closer to God only.