Obedience

Obedience is the key to how to live following God's guidence in the world. However, it is the most difficult thing to do. Obedience requires a full heart, not a partial. If we obey, that is it; no doubt, no complains, no whining, But rather rejoice, give thanks, and enjoy the situation. It is easy to say but I can tell you that it is very hard to do.
Through a devotion this morning with His words from Numbers 9:23, I confessed my weakness in faith and disobedient life in God. "At the Lord's command they encamped, and at the Lord's command they set out. They obeyed the Lord's order, in accordance with his command through Moses." Living the world is very similar with the Israelite's 40 years until they reached Cannan. We do know the final destination, Heaven, but still need to walk through in faith in every single step. I know and believe that we are saved by Jesus on the Cross, but still we complain, fall, and go astray. Right there, there is the Cross to tell us that Jesus already gave us victory and eternal life, we still get struggled to focus on the Cross but looking around us and starting to compare with others.
I can tell you that for this couple of weeks have been a big roller coast ride to me. Even though I knew and saw His guidence clearly, I got worried, complained, and tempted to quit going to the direction that God opened for me. There have been a number of distractions, and temptations on the road to make a clear decision.
However, I am thankful that God helps me to go on His path and to have faith to obey to Him completely.
Someone said if we fear God and trust Him with all our heart, we must not worry, or complain. We can't do both at the same time in one heart. I totally agree. If I said I trust Him with all my heart, that is it.
Because by obedience we are acknowledging God as our Lord, the loving Father, the Creator, and the Sovereign God. That is why God wants obedience from us. "To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat rams. "1 Samuel 13:22

Random thoughts

I have difficulties to sleep long enough lately with lots of thoughts in my head. Benefit of being an early bird (often too early though) is having a deep meditation of God's words and prayer time. I woke up at 2:30 this morning, having a devotion with the prodigal son's story. It always give me a deep insight of amazing grace. The detailed descriptions of the father when he saw the son's returning, give me tears always. Even though the son told him that he was not worthy even to be called a son, the father was not even listening what the son said, but just hugged and kissed his son, told his servants to bring the best robe for his son, the best robe!

Whenever I read this moment, I could hear God's voice that He loves me like that. That is the grace!

God gave His only Son to save us. What we need to be saved is just accepting Him as our Savior and surrender to Him all. The surrender brings blessings the best blessings like the best robe. However, we often hesitate to surrender "all", and want to negotiate a deal with God that some parts are ours. When we surrender all, it leads us to be free completely.

I shared some thoughts with my girls last night at their bed time because they were fighting and mean to each other, saying "it is unfair!". I told them that Jesus told us to live unfairly. I know it might have been difficult to understand as children but I tried to explain. Jesus showed how we should live this world unfairly. However, it leads to get ultimate freedom from heaven. That is also an amazing gift from God.

Somehow, God has a totally opposite principle in how to live this world. For example, if we surrender, we will get all with the best. And if you want to be a leader, you must be a servant. And so on....

That is why I said Jesus told us to live unfairly in view of the world. However, I know that it leads us true freedom, and blesses us with the best robes!!

Trust

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart." Proverbs 3:5

As a christian, I do believe in God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. However, sometimes I have to ask myself a question "Do I really trust in the Lord with all my heart?" If I do, I should not be worried, or anxious about things. So, it brings a fact that I do not trust Him with all my heart.

Lately, I had a chance to put everything on the table to lift up to the Lord about my future. I said in my prayers, and told other people that I lifted up everything to the Lord but I found myself that I still was very anxious about with lots of questions of what if. If I acknowledge the Lord as the Creator, the loving and faithful Father, and my Saviour, I should not worry for sure. Because He is the one who provides with His abundant love. I shared with my mom last night on the phone that I am too small to see a big picture that God has already made for me but what I can do is, trusting Him with all my heart that His way is the best way even though I can't see it right now in short, narrow distance. Through my 41 years life, God has shown me a number of times that He is the loving Father. He never let my little prayers not be answered. He sometimes makes me laugh and smile because He shows His love toward me in so many detailed little little things around me. When I felt deeply lonely one day, He showed me His love through beautiful clouds in the sky. I waved at the sky and smiled " Father, I love you too!!" He knows what I love, desire, and seek. He is the Loving Father who gave His only Son to save me. What do I need more to prove that I need to Trust Him with all my heart? I am a little and weak faith one. And He knows that too. However, I pray that He gives me His strength to trust Him with all my heart throughout my life.
"Holy God, My life is always in Your hand. Use me do Your will and to reflect Your reality on earth. As long as I live let my life count for good. Guide me to grow in faith and strength, and to live the abundant life that comes from Your grace. I pray in Jesus name, Amen."