Again!

I do not like to postpone stuff personally. I know how painful it is to be uncomfortable in mind if there is something I have to do it right away. That was also a good habit to finish my course work and qualifying exams without delaying with two little children and a partime job when I was Bloomington. I was kind of boastful that I rather facing the things right away than postponing with heavy burden in my heart. However, it was a totally wrong thought about myself because I have been postponing to finish my doctorate degree with an unwritten dissertation.
Last year Lent, I made my mind that I would write at least couple of pages every day during Lent to finish the dissertation but it never happened. After that, I even did not try to open my dissertation file from my document, look, or read any source for that. I put it all under somewhere that I even do not see near by. Even though it stinks to think about it, I avoided thinking about it and did not want to start again. I know that I will enjoy studying, reading, and even writing if I start again. But a fear was what if I again fail to continue like last year.
Even though I am not that briliant or smart, God gave me a good part that I do work hard. My excuse has been my work. I honestly did not have much time to sit and think about my dissertation at all for two years. I even have not slept that much to keep up with my work, kids, and housework. But, I've got to do what I've got to do. Here we go again, I have started studying for my dissertation again today. I just wrote a full one page only today but read some more, and opened my file again. I know... I might fail again to finish 100 pages of my dissertation but I have prayed may the Lord give me His wisdom and strength that I do not make any excuses in here and there that I am tired, busy, and do not have a moment to do it. Somehow, I can tell that the Holy Spirit within me is happy that I decided to face to what I need to do.
Lent is the time to get nearer to Jesus by praying, reading, meditating, and practicing His love and teachings. For me, this year Lent will be nearer to Jesus by writing my dissertation. :)
I need lots of prayers for sure. God is the one who has been the main support to get me through until this moment in my education, and I want to pursue what He has offered me in the best way.